How to stop self care being another chore on your massive to-do list

self care bath build a life you love

This February we have been reclaiming romance at Build a Life you Love, looking for ways to fall in love with our everyday life. Finding moments of mundane magic.

As we come to the end of the month we’ve been wondering how to take this forward, to keep the magic going.

At the heart of our approach to self-care is our nine square self-care grid. We recognised that lives are multifaceted so we identified nine areas that we feel contribute to a fulfilling one.

self care grid build a life you love

The problem with self-care is that it can be regarded as another chore. Something else for the “To Do” list alongside, “book dentist appointment” and “complete tax return”. If that’s the case then having nine categories of self-care might push you over the edge!

But I think there’s another, more romantic way to look at this.

The word romance comes from the world of knights and chivalry. The first romances were medieval tales of heroic knights who went on quests, defeating monsters to win the love of a lady. Those days may be long gone but I think we can give these ideas a modern twist.

A knight had to master many skills and they weren’t all about combat. They had to develop a knowledge of music, learn to read and write, recite poetry and, believe it or not, dance! These were all regarded as essential arts.

What if we elevate self-care from a chore to a romantic art? Learning to look after your body, your mind and your emotions then become skills to acquire to enhance your life not items on a “To Do” list to prevent something going wrong.

Looking after your home and your money also become arts, as does managing your virtual space, being part of a community, developing your world view and exploring the nature of your spirit.

As such, the nine square grid becomes a curriculum for the art of life. Areas to explore, not just problems to be solved.

The grid is also the foundation of our Winter Retreat. It has a lovely activity for each of the nine areas and can be seen as a primer for these life arts. An opportunity to explore each of the areas in turn.

“Make your life a romantic adventure and love will find you.” Martha Beck

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selfcareTracy SmithComment